I gotta write about this. It is a bit off-color, and might be offensive to some, so some folks may prefer to pass on this posting. Okay, you’ve been warned.
Patty and I were at the Green Valley Casino just south of The Strip in Las Vegas. Actually, its in Henderson, and just 5 miles away from the main hotels and casinos.
It was Saturday night, and Patty and I were looking for a nice dinner without fighting the casino crowds. We found a real good Italian restaurant called Gaetano’s, had dinner, then headed over to Green Valley where I wanted Patty to meet a DJ I’d hung out with the last time I was in Vegas. His name is DJ Drew Downs, and he does an amazing job, mixing video and music in the posh Drop Club at the casino. We visited with Drew, and told him what a great time we’d been having in town and how much we’d enjoyed The Beatles – LOVE show at The Mirage where we were staying. Drew got all excited and asked if we were going to see Steel Panther?
“Who?” Never heard of them.
“Oh my Gawd! You gotta see these guys!” Drew leaned over, and explained. “These guys do cover songs from all the Hair Bands of the 80’s. You gotta see them! I mean, they’re a bit nasty, but they are so good. And its free! They’ll start in about 20 minutes.”
“Yeah, they play right here at the casino. Same place that Lyle Lovett played earlier. Right over there” He pointed to a huge video screen above a theater entrance, the Steel Panther promo image shining brightly.
Patty and I sat at the bar. She played Kino while I had a glass of wine. The 2 fellas next to us were puffing away on a big glass water pipe and offered me a hit on their hookah. I put a plastic tip on the mouthpiece at the end of one of the hoses and took a nice puff of what tasted like raspberry pipe tobacco. Cool and smooth. We talked briefly and they asked if we were here to see Steel Panther. I smiled and said, “Well, we originally came just to hang out here at the bar and listen to Drew, but y’all are the second ones to ask if we’re going, so I guess we will be going”
They said that we just HAD to see these guys. They’re from Los Angeles, and were a riot to see. They do Def Leppard, Van Halen, Great White, Motley Crew, Poison, Guns N Roses, etc. What a blast. Yes, we’re going! And its free!
Oh my goodness we laughed so hard! Right off the bat, the band came out with guitars blaring away, drums pounding out the familiar tunes of ‘Once Bitten, Twice Shy’ and ‘Pour Some Sugar On Me”. Hair, headbands, Spandex tights, colored scarfs, studded belts and low slung guitars.
After a few songs to get everyone in the groove, they stopped to chat with the audience a bit. It was then that I realized these guys were not just putting on a show, they’ve got a pretty funny act to go with it. They started talking about boobs, and screwing, and licking their fingers, rubbing their crotches, and making lots of gestures at the pretty girls up front. Patty and I were in the shadows of the club half way back, thankfully, because next, they started to pick out people in the audience to make fun of. Fat people. Bald people. Old people. They spotted a mother/daughter combo and proposed they join in a bedroom tumble with group. The lead singer then sang a song of their own about moms and daughters and sex and screwing and all that. It was funny, I have to say. This is Las Vegas, after all.
Their act continued like this, a few songs, some banter with the crowd, primping with their hair, crotch grabbing, then a few more songs. Lots of fun. But they cracked me up with a little story about something their dad had told them that they had made into a song. Up on the screen, they flashed a black and white graphic image, while they held their own fists up in the air, flashing the same sign like any good Rock and Roll salute.
The song is called “Two In The Pink and One In The Stink”. I laughed my butt off. They pounded away on their guitars, licking their fingers, pinching their nipples, and picking out girls in the audience to invite backstage after the show. Two in the pink and one in the stink. I’m still laughing at that one!
It was a great show, capturing all that those bands stood for: girls, sex, partying, and basic debauchery. They pulled girls up on stage to grind on imaginary poles, teasing to give us a boob shot, hiking their skirts up to show panties – all that.
They played and made fun of each other in the group too. The bass player looked like the one ultra-feminine guy from Duran Duran with his full evening, lady make-up, wide headband and long flowing hair that he kept whipping from side to side. Up on the video screen, they projected videos of the song they were singing, with lots of slutty chicks and bottles of booze being guzzled.
They covered lots of fun songs, sang their own songs and ended with a the stage full of girls suggesting group sex and intoxicating substances after the show. This certainly wasn’t for everyone, but was probably no worse than most comedy improv shows either.